Role Changes
You have many roles — for example, wife, mother, daughter, sister, volunteer, company president. Changes in these roles and temporary disruptions due to the cancer treatment can affect your self-esteem. A cancer diagnosis can interfere with one or all of these roles. That can be a result of the stage of cancer. Or the treatment may impose limitations on your ability to do things on your own. Being too tired to maintain household routines and now needing help can make you feel depressed or guilty. Medical expenses or loss of income can cause financial stress. This added stress can cause changes in your behavior and interfere with your relationships.
Our society often defines who we are by our role in life. But with cancer, how you see yourself is very personal. Self-esteem is often linked with who we are in our community. If lowered self-esteem causes feelings of worthlessness or lack of purpose, depression may result. Relationships and your intimacy with your partner may be affected. Lowered self-esteem can make you want to pull away from a relationship.
Talking about your feelings in the beginning can help stop those feelings from becoming destructive and unhealthy. However, if cancer does cause a temporary role change, you may want to take advantage of that change. For example, you may be able to spend more time with your family. You may want to become more involved in your relationships or spend more time on hobbies.
It’s no secret that a cancer diagnosis will change a woman's life. For many women, cancer will slow down the fast pace of life. For some, it may be the first time they can think about themselves and their own needs. The important message is that no one knows how she will feel once a cancer diagnosis is made. Talking about your feelings, especially with your partner, will not change your diagnosis. But it can bring you closer to the relationship that you and your partner may have been too busy to share. Make the effort to stay open to communication with your partner, health care team, or a counselor. That will help replace negative thoughts with more healthy ones.
